Saturday

Stoopid Cupid

I've been unofficially single for about 6 weeks now. I made it official about 2 weeks ago. Men are already turning into vultures. I didn't think I looked so desperate. Maybe I smell like fresh meat because they are acting like carnivores. Too many propositions to mention. Just way too many for me to want anything so very very common. "no I am not going to date another man who works in this building...sorry too close for comfort" "no, I'm afraid that it would ruin a perfectly good friendship...sorry....", "no, its just too soon.....(as if I have regrets)", "no, I just want to concentrate on : my kid, my house, my career, my writing, my friends, me...." NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!!!!!!!!!!
Seriously I am not that cute. No one is THAT cute.
Why is it that men think that anytime a woman is single that she is on the market? I try to give polite refusals but from the incredulous reactions I am getting, they just don't believe that I am not interested in climbing on another merry-go-round. I don't need a man to complete me. At this point I am not even sure I want one.
Right now there is so much I can do.
I can blow my nose without hiding in the bathroom. I can wear my sweats whenever and whereever I damn well please. I can skip the make-up, not to mention I don't even have to brush my hair if I don't want to. I can have cereal for dinner. I get to control the remote. That's right.... I have the power baby!!!! If some guy beeps in while I am talking to my sister...I can just keep right on talking and let him handle the voice mail. I can hang out with my guy friends without worrying that the green eyed monster is gonna show up. I don't have to pretend I am helpless to make some little boy feel like a big man. I can do it on my own now Sugar.
I don't have to explain myself to anyone.
I don't have to tell anyone where I am going to be or schedule around stuff.
I can buy what I want at the grocery store.
I can waste the beer on my hair.
I always get the last cup of coffee.
And if I have gas....well I bet you can guess.
Life is sweet. Maybe I'm not getting any heart shaped boxes this year but I can buy myself my own chocolate anyway.
Cupid hasn't been that nice to me. Its about time he gets what he deserves!!!
Well it is Valentine's Day isn't it.

4 comments:

mrs.missalaineus said...

love the flogging cupid pic.

it's good to have the power and you are so right, we can buy our own damn candy anytime we want!!!

xxalainaxx

cw2smom said...

Love that graphic! Love the entry! Men! Arrrrgggh!!! Blessings for a better aim from Cupid..when you are ready of course! Lisa

nollyposh said...

LOl! Loved this entry!

Connie said...

it was bad enough I already had to 'go' but I about peed my pants reading this -then comes the pic at the end-ah man-now I really gotta GO....