Saturday

Only your real friends will tell you when your face is dirty. ~Sicilian Proverb

Vampires.

I have a love hate thing with them....the real ones and the fantasy ones. Even when I know they would only take the life from me...  
I stretch out my neck in invitation.....

It all sounds so sexy doesn't it?

Kinda....in the fantasy world.

In my real world I find these people all the time. They don't have fangs or piercing eyes...they have needs and problems and they want me to fix them.

Never mind that I have my own or that my family needs me too. I'm learning how to say "No" though. Learning the hard way actually. A few friendships have ended when I stopped the blood flow, though most have been understanding. That's a good thing really.

Eventually the wounds will heal and the sun will come out.

Thursday

Forget love - I'd rather fall in chocolate! ~Sandra J. Dykes

I'm still single.

Its been a long while since I've said those magic *I love you* words to a man. Probably longer still since I've meant them or even knew what they meant.

I've been reevaluating my life and wondering what I'm doing that keeps me in this state...some of my friends and family have been quick to point to all my "guidelines" and having my mind set on a certain course of events.

They are probably right when they say I must bend. I'm trying.

Its uncomfortable loosening those parts of my heart that I've been holding onto so tightly. Maybe I'm just afraid of more pain...

The real question, I guess, is:  

Am I more afraid of spending my life alone or of finding someone to spend it with?